When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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