I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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