well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
