with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.