Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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