I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
