my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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