just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
