Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
