I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize
