I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
