Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
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