i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
