No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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