The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
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I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
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sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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