I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
