he wants to bone in the snuggie
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
