I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
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