maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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