He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
