doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
