I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
