i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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