come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Acid is not a monday night drug
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
