at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Don't make out with my wife yet
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
