end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
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We had to coat check the pizza.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
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He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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