She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
