I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
It's just like the Real World with babies
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
This is my gift to your gina
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
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