is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT