I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?