no, he came in my armpit
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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