eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
