3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Randomize
