I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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