We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
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