He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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