Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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