Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
