thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
