therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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