Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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