maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
