Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize