with your own penis?
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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