He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize