At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
This is classic penis vs brain.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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