sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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