Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
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