I'm gonna have a badass scar
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
