My hand turned me down
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
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