oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I understand Curling. That high.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
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