I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
