I don't remember. Are we still dating?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
