How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
