Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
vagina is talking i cant
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Randomize